confused?

haha...dunnoe why i feel like bloggin again....i haf alot to sae...but somehow i'm afraid to sae it....maybe becuz it might hurt myself and others bah....so i shall sae it here....todae someone told mi i look like i'm avoiding them...do i seem like dat?maybe becuz i'm still confused...trying to hold on to something which dosen't belong to u in the first place....dreaming of something impossible....it's not like b4...and it neva will be....for once time moves u can neva get it back....right now i'm grasping thin air....her attitude maybe has not changed...just that i'm more sensitive bah....so that may explain my attitude towards all of u?cos maybe i'm avoiding her?but i dun think it seems hat way does it?haha....bullshiting here the pt is when something is injured or urt...it needs sometime to heal...so gif mi space and time but dun go away so far that i feel alienated all over again....its raining now...so it really adds to the mood...haha....the past week was alrite...i neva tot too much bout her....even as those feelings came in i forced them away...for i tink that its really time to bring back my perspective of life and get my piorities rite....oh well...my older brother just got a eariing on his left ear man...wow thats so cool....but my dad saw it and i guess he was disappointed....i understand why....but my dad is the traditional type....so i guess his thinking is still quite 'old'....but hey he is my dad and i haf to respect him and his decisions...no matter that sometimes i hate him...ah well....life really sucks?and i dunnoe why?soemthings really outta ur control....