...

bloody pissed...wanted post also cannot post...grrrhh...todae is a boring dae...morning mass was BORING....let mi repeat letter be letter...B-O-R-I-N-G!...aiyoh singing the hyms hor...maria goh cannot sing still ying ying lai...lolz...cannot stand lo....den todae our class add a new member...hm...not making any judgements till sometime later...haha...den got A maths retest...dunnoe will pass anot...boring boring...oh yeah...zhikang was absent frm sch...shucks man...very bored...no-one to tok to...or make noise with...ur a damn great guy....but i cant be one...haha...too many flaws and faults...den after sch go SRC room to plae...den plae till 5+...go compass eat...den jiu come home...boring boring...i'm too tired to care bout anything except hmwk,frenz,exams....wun guan anthing more den dat....wo xiang fang qi AI QING!...haha...time for work le...tired tired...tc peeps....

bored...

todae got mass in the morning....boring....den zhikang neva come sch also...so doubly boring...den out class got one new member...frm other sch...hm...den got retest for A maths...dunnoe will do better anot...den after sch jiu go SRC room plae...den plae plae...den jiu go eat abit den jiu come home...must do homework le...i'm too tired to bother with anything now....i dun gif a damn....i'm just going to chiong hmwk and studies le....muhahahaha....sian.........

confused?

haha...dunnoe why i feel like bloggin again....i haf alot to sae...but somehow i'm afraid to sae it....maybe becuz it might hurt myself and others bah....so i shall sae it here....todae someone told mi i look like i'm avoiding them...do i seem like dat?maybe becuz i'm still confused...trying to hold on to something which dosen't belong to u in the first place....dreaming of something impossible....it's not like b4...and it neva will be....for once time moves u can neva get it back....right now i'm grasping thin air....her attitude maybe has not changed...just that i'm more sensitive bah....so that may explain my attitude towards all of u?cos maybe i'm avoiding her?but i dun think it seems hat way does it?haha....bullshiting here the pt is when something is injured or urt...it needs sometime to heal...so gif mi space and time but dun go away so far that i feel alienated all over again....its raining now...so it really adds to the mood...haha....the past week was alrite...i neva tot too much bout her....even as those feelings came in i forced them away...for i tink that its really time to bring back my perspective of life and get my piorities rite....oh well...my older brother just got a eariing on his left ear man...wow thats so cool....but my dad saw it and i guess he was disappointed....i understand why....but my dad is the traditional type....so i guess his thinking is still quite 'old'....but hey he is my dad and i haf to respect him and his decisions...no matter that sometimes i hate him...ah well....life really sucks?and i dunnoe why?soemthings really outta ur control....

damn bored...

todae damn bored although no sch...although sch is not such pain anymore...it beats being bored....todae in morning go tution till 12.30....den jiu go home...read book...take afternoon nap....den evening go haf dinner with granddad...ju comehome...sian again...lotsa homework not done...damn boring...

whee....

ok todae was quite ok...morning during assembly...had to do something sia suai...had to intro the house caps. just because of the sports dae thing...hen bo liao lor...den had maths lesson...haha ms lim cannot tahhan mi le...cos i always toking...wadeva...den chinese test should be quite easy bah...den went to SRC and plae ....den plae till late late denn jiu go home...sian...no one at home damn boring...haizz...got to study!!!....haha must change mindset...MUST CHANGE!...haha

boring...

yesterdae was a fine dae...got sch mission...den todae boring....during LCE lesson got talk by the pricipal....todae i felt she has one TOO FAR man...i tot wat she did was too much...and that poor soul had to endure so much humiliation....although she tot it was for a good cause....i personally felt most ppl would haf felt the same pity for that guy...man...and that stupid Mr Kang haf to add a few more words...which i tink weren't warrented or needed...i tot he was a suck-up...haha...dun like him anyway...a fren even commented how he got his teaching license in the first place...well...had maths test also todae...dunnoe will pass anot

whee?

fri went to bbq....yesterdae all dae at home wasting my life away...todae..going to study later...justchanged skin...life sucks...haha...i'm feeling better after having a nice chat with a very nice fren...haha...welll....hope my hand is recovering....i want to be up and running in a few months man...haha

this is FUCK MAN!

sorry for not updatiung for such a long time....yesterdae was a great dae out yeah?...hm...todae was the dae i took my cast out....

AND there is SOME gud news.....AND PLENTY of BaD news.....

so lets always start with the good news...first and foremost...my cast is taken out...wooohooo...hahacan finally give it a through wash since like three weeks ago!...lolz thats the end of the good news though...

NOW for the BAD news...

my hand has not really recovered at all...although there were a little improvements in the alignment of my bones...the shocker came when the doc told me the ligaments that hold the two bones that make up ur arm is torn...around the wrist dere...so i still cant turn my hand...now actually my arm is worse den b4...my whole arm, which includeing my palm, is facing up means i cant rite...haha...previously b4 the cast my hand also could not turn....but my palm was facing down...so i still could rite....now i stll can use my rite hand to feed myself,to rite,to do any straining work...last time the doc told mi dislocation...now they drop me this saying there is a tear in the ligaments...i haf to go see the doc in another two weeks...ontop of that they gif me rehab...to ease the pain....bloody mofos...one week this another week that...so next week they going to tell mithe ligaments are totally torn and need to go for op...shyt this ppl man...doc told mi this kinda injury needs normally takes 6 weeks to heal...thinking of all these really makes me get pissed off man...plus all these things need money...miseralnle 30 mins consultation with doc already earns them likee wat?30bucks?now u see y docs lead good lives and the government is so rich?bloody a*****s...i wonder how long tis going to take...if u all coul;d save me the trouble...convince my dad to getting the surgery done and thats it...BUT the doc said even surgery is not 100%...FUCK! i'm a cripple...haha...wth...how many more times do u want to screw mi over huh LORD?wat haf i really done to u to deserve this?did i insult ur son in previous lives?could u just HELP here?

haizzz....wtf...life really sucks...i've got nth left..........

so bored..i'm wasting my life...

never update yesterdae was because to lazy...hm...yesterdae nth happen much...frm morning till night was slouching infront of the computer...really bored...plae my games till dun want to plae le...den at night jiu watch tv...watched the sixth sence....would haf been a cool show had it not been my 'helpful' who told mi wat was the twist of the show...but quite cool the show...really kept mi on my toes...not like asian horror scary where they literally scare u with their grosteque faces...this show however makes use of the sounds...very nice, cool show...hm...den this morning...sian alo...later going to study with eds and wendyl...i want to wake up frm my deep slumber...and not to disappoint my parents anymoreplaning to show den the reot bk tml...and oinemore thing...though feelings for u haf not fadedi'm trying now to be ur fren all over again...haha...well thats all...going to haf a sumptious and yummy lunch...cheers and tc peeps =]

i gif up...

ok i gif up.read clearly:I GIF UP...i'm not sure if i'm doing the right thing...for i'm letting go...i'm tired...major exams are around the corner...i dun want to spend my energy thinking on y this and that...yeah i'm just foolish of me...i dunnoe...now we hardly seem to tok...i'm afraid to be in ur company...i'd spend time...sometimes too much time...thinking on y this and tat hapen...just going to push it all away...i hope everything would resume normal...i'm just going to stear clear of ur direction for the moment...clear everything in my head...wow....sounds like i'm some pyscho....wadeva...jf sae i shldn't gif up...yeah one shld not gif up at the first obstacle because u cant overcome it...if not u will NEVER...die die must try!...but sadly...i cant...for i've been hurt far too many times and i'm just afraid to go on...afraid that i might lose u as a fren...lose the friendship...all my life i've been thinking too much...hm...ironicaly my results ain't that good...still got plenty of time to regret my actions now...i'd really like to talk to u...hold long conversations...haha but wat wishful thinking i haf...for i cant bring myself toking to u for i am afraid, i haf an uninteresting characrter,most likely would run out of things to sae...see wad i mean?i worry toomuch...ah well i'm not going to touch tis subject for sometime i hope...i want my old self BACK!lookout !i'll be on my way back in no time!or so i hope.......tc peeps =]

life sucks....

EVELYN HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!haha....todae cant celebate with ur hor...cos got tution...life still sucks and its still too darn boring...haizz...i'm a jerk...gtg tc all...

i dunnoe....

sch has been really been boring...thank god for frens...tanks to eli for keeping mi sane during maths lesson and larry for making the pain of sitting through miss lim class fun....haha....thanks to zhi kang for being a wonderful fren...no matter wat i did to u...i appologise here first...though i noe u wun read this...thank dine and claud gif mizi chi....haha.... and sorry to others...if i had did anything bad...or foirgot something impt bout ur....i sincirely appologise....=]

...

hehe?i am back to my high self...hm...dunnoe y also...keep entertaining ppl tis few daes...hope i brought a realsmile to their faces =].as for me....well...i'm still ok...just confused with stufff and gotta bring my academic aims back into sight...currently i'm disabled...two more weeks to go...i must perservre...i'm still in love with her...though i noe me and her is an unrealistic possibility...i'll just ride out this phase...i'm just glad we're still frens...haha....tc ppl and god bless!=]

i haf a Fu*kEd U* attitude...

i really haf lousy temper control...again todae lost my temper over minor irrittating things...haha and ppl sae when i get worked up my face goes RED...hm...den go tution sian sian....must learn to work with one hand...shit sia....damn mah-fan....but wat to do...bring this all upon myself...everytime i sae i haf a fucked up life....i think of ppl in poverty and starvation in the less fortunate parts of the world....and den i feel life for e isn't actually that bad...its just temporary...would pass over soon...and yetis this wat ppl dub as 'GROWING PAINS'?where young teens ponder on wat they really want...get confused?shant tink anymore