F***....

damn shit man...my com really sucks....and i haf lousy control of my temper...or so ppl sae...my hand still has not recovered....had quite alot of pain...can feel swollen again le...shyt....if using this method of using the cast to put the bone into back into place fails...the operation room beckons....which is big shyt...or my dad would refuse and would put me through more pain by going to the chinese doctors...again...when i think their methods won't work....not that i neba try...try le still can't how?...damn fucked up with tis com....almost back the monitor with the hand in cast....the cast is so hard....hit tin can tin can bend...wahaha...i got an invincible hand...laming....todae got see the last year grad class come take their 'O' lvl resuls...hm...wun sae good or bad...just felt very scared for in a yrs time i would be down dere tooo,waiting with sweating palms for the miserable piece of paper also...really worried bout the looming exams...keep saying want to work hard...in the end is me sitting infront of computer....

argh...

I.WANT.TO.BREAK.MY.HAND.
I.WANT.TO.BREAK.MY.LIFE.
I.FEEL.MISERABLE.
SOMEBODY.TAKE.ME.FAR.AWAY.AND.NEVA.COMEBACK.
i.seriously.hate.my.life.

shyt...

i just came back frm the specialist clinic at CGH...the guys dere put a cast on my hand...and i haf to keep it for 3 WEEKS!like wtf...sian lor...now cant type,write,eat..very mah fan....in contants pain also...cos doc forcibly push back bone den use cast to hold....fucking uncomfortable...fucking irritating....fucking troublesome...

i'mingoodsprits...

hoho...i noe i've not been updating regularly....abit lazy lah..haha...lazy to think bout past few daes de dong xi lah...maybe becuz cannot remember?or isit dun want to remember?hahaz...dunnoe lah...but i'm quite happy with life now...i'll live life as it comes to me...passin dae by dae...wasting my time...hahaz...and also enjoying life...thats the main point in life yes?maybe learning also bah...haha...so todae in the morning quite sian diao lah...cos first lesson jiu must see BAH-GAY de lian...sian lor...7 early 8 earlt[translate in chinese pls..hahaz] must scold ppl wan le...she no scold ppl for one dae will die de lo...buay tah-HAN!...damn demanding lah...den got english...quite dissapointed with my marks...esp my summary...must work hard...den pure geog rite...also sian diao lo...must do and do self-study for that sub le...den aftrecess...LAO TIAN YE heng heng bless me that dun haf to see MS LIM de act-cute-buay-cute de lian and attitude...haha...den the relief teacher is also funny looking de...neck-long,small head and normal body...den go mr pang class..den go dere do work...den jiu LCE...high with my group...tok loads of crap...its so nice to haf a good laugh once in awhile...to transport ur mind frm the present...into a temporary place of fun and no worries...reality has always the sickest of ways to pull u right back into it...found out that the field outside our sch had caught fire...smoke was irritating and choking...but during chinese lesson i could do my letter writing in time to pass up...wahaha...so sian...went tution just now...den came home...i suddenly felt i haf changed again....i'm no more moody as b4?...or maybe i just dun want to remember my unhappy tots?hm...STM?...in a way its good bah...dun dwell on the past focus on the present and think for the future?haha...so cheesy...sian...doing ss project now..tired going off le...tc ppl bb....SMILE ALWAYS PPL!

woots?

hehe todae out the whole dae...morning go to mac house...go dere onli to find me the earliest....cos they neva tell me they all change time...diao so go dere around 9.30...wait till 10 seok chin come den later the rest stream in...den the game Big Small(loose translation)...haha...den plae the normal games....den jiu sian diao after lunch...haha cos quite sian lah...den we stay till 5 plus den go to k box at hougang plaza...but dunnoe y dey neva go?too expensive bah...den in the end go to marina dere eat....eat the 12 dollar one....i tink that one better den the 10 dollar one lo...i mean the food lah...service is a suspect bah...den eat eat eat...frm 6+ eat till like 8 liao...dunnoe why i b4 go eat look sian sian...den after eating jiu high le...haha eating really lifts ur mood?haha...sian diao...come home jiu no more adrenaline rush liao...sian...very hungry now...

its sad...

todae finally went to sch...hoho the feeling was great...so happy...hm...den english lesson tio gan by mrs ng cos qian her lotsa newspaper cutting le...hm...chines also qian alot...den during maths lesson i quite siao liao with larry...den think wendyl and lorraine and whoeverwas affected by me and him were pissed....so sae sorry lah to ur...didn't mean it...but its always nice to haf some fun in ur life?!yes?hm...so after skool stay back and did mrs ng de homework...dench jiu go with mac angeline flor-huei fulin jf eve and vance to puaygek house...den go down dere high...but i can see lotsa ppl in the group having personal probs or somesort...and also not just in this group...some frens outside also having probs....i really feel like an absolute IDIOT COS I CANT HELP DEM...everyone has their own fears and probs and demons to face...and yet...i can onli watch them going through the pain and torture themselves?and yet they always seem so cheerful outside...always trying to cheer so and so up...knowing that they themselves haf probs also and yet dey dun want to share it...yeah its personal...so well...cant help much...wad is LOVE?it seems to take many forms...it can cause hurt...yet it can bless couples with bliss and happiness...it causes hatred...yet it also creates stronger bonds...its beautiful to look at yet hard to comprehand and understand?not exactly a very big problem...onli do u wonder sometimes its hard to forget someone whom u care so much...or that having a single conversation with *that person might brighten up ur dae considerbly?i dun understand love...thats why i dun get it....but i understand friendships?but isn't friendship a type of love?but u onli share care and concern...i'm just lucky to haf many wonderful frens...really WONDERFUL...although it may seem gay for me to sae tis...but i love u all and cant thank ur enuff...truly...ad yet i cant help ur or gif anything in return?especially when ur are in trouble?i was actually quite happy todae until i see sullen and down faces...not all seem to be having probs with love...some with firendship...bot saying i dun haf probs in these....but not to big bah...hahaz...but they all seem to be in agony no?shant tok any more depressing stuff le...CHEERUP PPL!easier said den done...but if dere is a will dere is a way yes?..thats all tc nites all =]

nice?

found this amusing and cute skin...hehe so tok it...like it? dunnoe wat song should i put along with it...haha

whywhywhy?

fuck man...yesterdae actually wanted to go after going to the polyclinic after gettingan x-ray on my hand to see wat was the extent of the damage...but turned out that after the x-ray...the doc refer me to the A&E dept. at Changi General Hospital...go dere...whole ting cost 65 bucks...wtf...just for consultation leh...den go see the doc...let him see the x-ray films...turned out that i actually haf a small fracture...but its been a week liao so healing le bah...den i haf a dislocation of my wrist...so herecommended for an op.! wah i was like tinking so serious ah....i tot they would help me push the bone back one....chey...den go out actually wanted to get a cast on my hand...den my dad sae dun wan...go to see chinese physician...see wat the guy can do...cos he sae having an op would leave scar...and there isn't a 100% chance the op would allow my hand to be as good as new...so go all the way to chin swee road or something...opposite the subourdinate court...wah go dere around 4 rite....den wait till 11 in the night den doc can see me...kaoz...whole dae wasted my time....dat guy see me den started pushing and pulling...straighting my nreves and all those...but funny thing is he neva push back my bone?got to see him on thur again...den my dad sae he go down early in the morning get no. den i aft sch cor him...why so mah fan ah...i didn't want tis...why i so suai...tis hand causing so much trouble...plus all these consultation need money de leh...not cheap somemore lo...fuck actually todae wanted to go to sch de...but becuz yesterdae reach home around 1 in the morning...so cant wake up in time...i dunnoe now lah...damn scared...

FARK!

my hand is permanantly twisted...FUCK!....thats just farking great...cheebye...dumb mi...kao eh...i'm really fucking scared my hand is screwed...how can my life go any more wrong or twisted???fuck fuck fuck....

ok....

sorry for not updating for so long....was quite lazy lah...haha...plus my dad keep using com to do work so let him do lo...tis year de chinese new year not good not bad...soso lah...didn't haffun leh...except maybe at night bah...on the first dae of new year....mycousin'shusband brought me and my other two cousins to plae pool!haha...so nice havent been playing the game for a while liao....haha had a great time won a few frames frm my cousin's husband...whom my cousin sae very good de...haha dunnoe is he let mi anot de...den go home late late liao...arond3+ in the morning....chu er go out in the evening...den xian xian jf ask us go out but all shops mostly close liao....den go kfc eat...den mi jon and fulin go jf house plae...sian sian....den fridae also sian sian...go see the zhong yi...wahhe man-handle my hand sia...koa eh...the bone push back liao...but the whole hand still not straightened out...den saturdae go visiting...to mr ong house...den mr er house...den angeline house...den jianfeng house...with mac jf angeline and later flor-huei...den later onli left mi and jf cos all go home...den call jon out den go eat macdonalds...wah their chicken prosperity reall SUCKS!...feel like puking after having that meal....urleah...waste money ~$~...den go jf house dere de fitness corner...den ask him bring down his sparklers and bombbags...haha den frm 9 plae till 11...den we make alot of video...lolz lame tio...den go home bathe slp...sian......i really dun like tis year's CNY...cos it apparently strained my parents relationship....normally CNY at my small aunts place would be very nice...but tis year...more quieterden usual?...hm...dunnoe not so fantastic maybe?or did i feel no fun cos there are things i'm brooding abt?valentine's tml...shyt man...chocolate's havent buy...i hope she dosen't mistake it for anything else...just want toto sae hope we could still be frends...haha?see keep brooding over tis kinda things...how to be happy...even u run frm it...i still see problems plagueing ppl when tis ppl are actully wanting to avoid the the prob...nvm if u dun understand...just feel like letting out a long breath i haf been hlding for a long time...so tc and cheers everyone!

sian

CNY coming!...haha sian....i just sprained my wrist again in todae's mathc....my performance really suck man....must go and train more liao...still got quite alot of homework havent do leh....haizzz must go haf rest liao tml got performance...

wadeva.

todae wake up....haf breakfast...plae com....online...den peng ask me go study...den go kovan mac....den study frm 4 to 6...den angeline go home....mac came....den go ps...den plae abit of arvade...ate dinner at macdonalds...den go home...on train did stewpid stuff...haha...den came home online...sian sian hor...tml got A maths test...yi xiang dao ms lim de lian jiu sian sian...haizz...y am i still not gan chiong for 'O's?...although i still fear for it?dun seem to be taking action in it leh...haizz...better buck up after CNY le...cya folks...nites

haha

i'm trying to change my mood ok...haha...i'm sorry to susan and company ah...i will try to get a line a.s.a.p...hm...den todae go flag-dae sian sian...den go watch horro movie...shyt man why did i ever allow myself into such a show...and den waste money scare self....haizz...

i'm sorry...

sorry for not for so long updating...I WANT TO SAE A VERY BIG THANK YOU TO ALL, ESPECIALLY SK DE RENAND SUSAN THEY ALL AND THOSE WHU GAF ME PRESENTS!!!...haha really thanks...love the presents alot...especially the shoe and fone...=D...been really down these few daes...cos of many probs...haizz...i'm 16 liao...i'm suppose toenjoy life now...not sulking...hm...my mums retrenced..tot my family had finally begun to pick up the pieces frm 1997 de recession...mum got retrecned on my birthdae...but she didn't tell me cos my birthdae...i really tink my birthdae damn suai...WO DE MUMMY HENG WEI DAH!!!!!!I LOVE U MUMMY!!!!...haha...I JUST HOPE MY FAMILY CAN HOLD OUT AGAIN THROUGH THIS CRISIS!

i'm so....

hey...happy birthdae to myself...and thank yew 4 charity for celebrating it with me....i must also thank the back row plus zhong jie and zhik for that WONDERFUL present!...haha really thank you guys...also thanks to all the well-wishers...but somehow...i feel empty todae...i dunnoe....just happy on the outside...souless on the inside...so i came home around 5...wanted to go tution...but mum ask mi not to go tution and go buy myself some clothes....MUM UR DAH BEST!!!...haha but i dun feel like going out...so go onli tampines to shop...bought a pair of jeans and a pair of boxers...wanted to find a shirt but cant find any dat i like...so go home...sometimes i really think that if life is so painful...y bring us here to torture ourself and torture others?...seriously...i tink my character SUCKS!...i just hate to hold up masks and act like nth is wrong and that ur fine when in actual fact ur NOT!...i must really thank ppl for puttin up with my non-sense...especially zhi kang...whu really haf to stand an irritating guy like me...i can that u and everybody else enuff for puttin up with my whining,tantrums and nonsense...THANK YOU ALL...since i'm now a year older...i hope i can be whu i really want to be...MYSELF!